The house seems empty. Eerily quiet after all the hustle of the hospital corridors. Now what? You think to yourself. What's first? This new little one is completely dependent on you for everything. In many ways, this landing zone is its own form of drop shock!

All. Night. Long. Feeding, then crying, then feeding then crying! It's easy to become concerned that maybe you're just not producing enough milk, and your new baby may very well starve. Cue deep feelings of failure (which are then exacerbated because you're exhausted from the birth process and now not sleeping all night!)

Then it happens! Baby is free, and they are turned toward you. You gaze down at this little . . . stranger. Your feelings may be foreign, platonic, numb. You expected to adore this beautiful combination of you and your partner, but instead, the little one with smooshed features and strange colors contorts their face as their cries expand their lungs.

But how do you navigate your need to be close to your family and friends while still keeping baby healthy this Holiday Season?

When we feel the internal buildup of pressure, we often seek a way to relieve it (STERB: Short Term Energy Relieving Behaviors). The problem with STERBs is that they appear to work for a while, until they don't anymore. Then we seek out more of that behavior or even a new one in order to distract ourselves from the internal energy buildup.

C O M P A S S I O N Showing Compassion to Herself Compassion is such a misunderstood concept. If you look up the English meaning of this word, it lists it as a noun. A thing. As if we can hand it out or keep it for ourselves. But if you look at the etymology and roots of this word, you begin to understand it so much better and recognize how it can be so transformative for both us and others. Compassion stems from Latin and Greek Roots. Com - Coming near, close beside or toget

As children, we may have been given resources to know that these bodily sensations are actually our emotional responses to life. We may have been guided gently by caregivers teaching us the names of these different sensations, seeing us where we were, and showing us dignity and compassion. Or we may have had caregivers who were doing the best they could with what they had, but who were unable to guide us down a healthy emotional path.

What if we listened to the message that those little "feelings" those physical nuances were trying to speak to us? What if we paid attention to the body's whispers before it ever felt the need to yell?

Isolation can make postpartum depression so much worse! We were made for connection. We were made to support each other. And if we are not connecting with others, we are much more prone to be deceived into believing lies . . .