Add Compassion
- Hannah Norton
- 2 days ago
- 3 min read
C O M P A S S I O N
Compassion is such a misunderstood concept. If you look up the English meaning of this word, it lists it as a noun. A thing. As if we can hand it out or keep it for ourselves.
But if you look at the etymology and roots of this word, you begin to understand it so much better and recognize how it can be so transformative for both us and others.
Compassion stems from Latin and Greek Roots.
Com - Coming near, close beside or together
Passion - To suffer
(hint: it's actually a VERB - an action word)
For my grammar nerds, compassion stems from a subject and lands on an object. Compassion IS MOVEMENT from one source to its intended destination. The giver enacts motion and initiates changes in its receiver.
Historical examples:
 Jesus saw the crowd and was MOVED with COMPASSION since they had not eaten in three days (and he fed them all).
The good Samaritan saw the injured man and HAD COMPASSION on him (tending his wounds and paying for his recovery).
Harold Lowe who saw struggling survivors of the Titanic crash (and returned in his lifeboat to rescue those he could).
Jim Redmond who witnessed his son, Derek Redmond, injured on his 1992 Olympic Racetrack (ran past officials to put his arms around his son and assist him to finish his goal and cross the finish line.)
COMPASSION = ACTION
What does this actually mean? How does this help us take the next step on our journeys toward mental health?
Notice.
Name it.
Now what?
Compassion must start with awareness. Seeing. Knowing.
As adults, we frequently do home life (our day in and day out mundane) solo. Our daily ups and downs are not necessarily seen by others. Obviously, those of us who have kids are surround by little eyes (but they lack maturity and awareness to see us.)
It's easy to feel like our big feelings, our bodies speaking may never be noticed by anyone. But that's where I would encourage you to pause. You are SOMEONE. You can notice these big feelings, name them, then come along side of yourself and choose to show yourself compassion!
But isn't that selfish? Won't that cause me to be self-absorbed? Consider the alternative . . . treat yourself harshly, tell yourself to get over it, your body now feels threatened and not seen, you feel agitated and angry, your feelings speak louder, and eventually implode/explode resulting in emotional trauma to yourself and your family and friends.
Compassion is the solution.
Here's how it can look:
* After noticing and naming, take a few deep breaths, note the longing or the fear that is present
* Close your eyes and look at yourself like a child (think, how would I speak to my child or a child of a friend if I saw them struggling like this) and consider how you would long for someone to speak to you.
* Consider phrases like: "I care that you are experiencing this." "This is hard." "It makes sense why you feel ...." "I'm here. You are not alone." Speak to the little one inside who is afraid - who may not have been given permission to feel big feelings like this before.
* Then consider action: What would help you to feel better? What's one thing in your circle of control that you can act on?
(We cannot always solve the bigger problems or challenges of life that may create strong emotion, but we can care for ourselves gently in the midst of the challenge).
Sometimes care looks like:
* taking a short break to breathe or go for a walk
* finding something nutritious to eat
* taking a shower or bath
* spending time in prayer
* listening to music
* rubbing our feet and thanking our body for helping us to get through that hard day
Just because we are adults does not mean we have to have it all together. Our bodies and our emotions are still experiencing life and must be seen, validated, and honored. Learning to see ourselves and move toward ourselves with compassion can grow us in resilience and our ability to show compassion to those around us.
Compassion is the key to changing our emotional experience. When we learn and grow in compassion, we become more fully who we were created to be.